Watching the early news, the well-spoken news correspondent sweating his you-know-whats-its-off standing in Time Square claimed "for the first time in some fifty years" there's a new automotive-related IPO.... Followed by "and I can't even afford one of these..." pointing to a Tesla Roadster...
Never mind fifty years ago- this has to be the first auto IPO in the NASDAQ's history... for sure.
Fifty years ago- if there was a new IPO relating to a car- chances are- it would have been for a profitable company- but times have changed.
Seems despite producing a six-figure, all-electric roadster, and a CEO who is rumored to be near-bankrupt himself due to divorce... Tesla's numbers aren't too-much in the black either.
An IPO will help them raise much needed cash; however, traditionally- equities (at least in the 50-year-old view of them anyway- call me old-fashioned) have always been a bet on a company's future profits... Which for now, look like a long-shot.
Why didn't Tesla offer a bond offering?
Well- I don't mean to speculate- but... Any more debt riding on this ultra-high-end, six-figure electric sports car maker... Well, I don't think another debt offering was a viable option- if not for their own reputation and creditworthiness.
So as I was chugging away on the treadmill- I couldn't help but look back on history- on another IPO that went bust based-on promises of- a "car of the future."
Remember the Tucker '48? Preston Tucker built a better mousetrap too. To build his company he issues shares of stock based on "the car of the future... today."
He even sold dealer franchises... Long story (and a great movie) short- the Big Three put an end to Preston Tucker and his car... tipping-off the SEC into a full-scale investigation that mired the man and his name into history. Better car or not.
I'm not saying Tesla will suffer the same fate- but offering stocks for a company on shaky ground- in an industry near impossible to penetrate on a large (read profitable) scale... Well... it's not looking so good.
Car of the future... or profits of the future? When it comes to stocks- I'll still stick to the latter.
One thing I hated when I sold Mercedes-Benz cars myself- or when I sell anything today is a beggar.
While in prison he wrote his Mein Kampf but before the royalties came rolling-in, just as he was planning his bids to takeover the world- he was concerned about His Struggle to finance a 1924 Benz 11/40. (Figures... the jack-off.)
As written in the Seattle Times: "Hitler wrote to a Munich car dealer, the future dictator says he is having a hard time making up his mind about whether to purchase a newer model Benz 11/40 or the older 16/50 because he had concerns that the higher RPM's of the motor in the former might mean that it would have more mechanical problems.
"I can't get a new car every two or three years," he wrote.
He also noted that he had many court costs to pay once he was released and asked the dealer if he might arrange a discount for him, indicating that he had his eye on a particular 11/40 on the salesman's lot.
"In any case, please reserve the gray car that you have in Munich until I have clarity about my fate (probation?)," Hitler wrote."
And if its another thing I hate- is customers that assume either one thing or the other because of their own screwed-up logic.
Though I don't know if the Benz 11/40 was prone to mechanical failure because of higher RPM over the 16/50- this is just an example of what I like to call "a little bit of knowledge."
Most assholes today still have this little bit of knowledge that makes them the armchair expert in anything they spin- or swindle. Or beg for.
The 16/50 (Series 16- 50 Horses) was a 4-door 5-seater sedan; 6-cylinder, 12-valve straight (inline) gas engine; side valves (flathead, L-head), about 4-liters in displacement, 37.3 kW / 50.0 hp / 50.0 hp @ 2000 rpm / 2000 rpm / 2000 rpm, (or 50 horses) manual 4-speed transmission, rear wheel drive, 90 km/h / 56 mph / 56 mph top speed... About 55 MPH with a tailwind.
The 11/40 Hitler had his grubby little heart set on was a 4-door 5-seater sedan; 6-cylinder, 12-valve straight (inline) gas engine; side valves (flathead, L-head), about 3-liters in displacement, 29.8 kW / 50.0 hp / 50.0 hp @ 2250 rpm / 2000 rpm / 2000 rpm, (or 40 horses) manual 4-speed transmission, rear wheel drive, 80 km/h / 56 mph / 56 mph top speed... This thing barely made 50 MPH.
Either which way, neither of these cars were top Pre-War Mercedes-Benz offerings for their day- compare them to a modern-day E-Class if you will. And for the record- try finding an official photograph of either of these heaps- you can't- they just weren't important enough, let alone pretty- to take pictures of!
Maybe Hitler was just cheap? Add that to his attache of characteristics. But just thing- if it weren't for Hitler- none of these cars would be considered Pre-War. Think about it...
Actually- these first cars Hitler was going after were just called "Benz," the "Mercedes" moniker had not become paramount till a few years later.
Hitler did go on to owning (quite outright without a loan too, mind you)- a lot of Mercedes-Benz cars throughout his remaining years. Quite simply- they were his domestic car of choice- much like Elvis Presley preferred Cadillacs. It was just his preference.
Mercedes-Benz; however, was more than happy to oblige- doing anything they could to stay afloat during the war. They produced a lot of things for the effort- but limousines remain one of their obvious works.
Some (with a little bit of knowledge) assume Mercedes-Benz (I think it was Daimler-Benz at the time) was anti-Semitic in "offering" their cars at his disposal- when in actuality, something like over half of the Mercedes board was Jewish- the company having spent considerable efforts in hiding the fact- if anything, to save their co-workers!
Then again- Hitler was Jewish too- according to some accounts.
Just goes to show how twisted the man, the facts, and history sets out to be discovered.
No matter how it's paid for- he had good tastes in cars.
I've been meaning to write about this for a while in my somewhat defunct "Good Product" section- PayPal.
For as much as I can't stand their fees, and the virtual monopoly they've become intertwined with eBay (try buying or selling anything without using them) I must and will attest- if you ever have a problem, a question or if you just need someone to talk to (believe me, this is an invaluable thing to have...) PayPal is the company!
You e-mail them- they give you a PIN number- you call the toll-free number and punch-in the PIN- and viola- someone with a pulse answers the call.
Now, tell me an institution that is so forthright in actually talking to you today. That's progress.
Try getting in touch with the parent company eBay- and see what happens. You have a better chance of talking to dead Elvis. Not skinny or fat Elvis. The dead one.
But what's prompting me to write about this? Came across an interesting article about a PayPal founder, and Tesla pioneer- Elon Musk. He's a car guy who gets it too- even if you do like electric cars- which this car guy does not!
Evidently he's broke... or that's what the article would have you thinking. Again, a moron would believe or think he's broke.
The other day, someone asked me as we were passing some posh estates in tony, old-money Saddle River, NJ- "do you think these people feel the bad economy...." and you have to be a total idiot to 1.) count other people's money but 2.) it doesn't take an MBA to know- yeah they feel it... But they're still living in a bigger house than you are.
Sure, divorce sucks- especially if you have children- but not all the money in the world- or a couple hundred million dollars can keep you in the same room married with that special someone, well... You just have to do it. Bankrupt, bust or not.
Is your ex worth it? Again, not my problem- but as for Elon Musk being broke... I'll never forget MC Hammer when he was on Oprah years ago... he put it best "you should all be broke like me..." I can't remember if it was fat Oprah or skinny Oprah- but it was the paid Oprah who brought this to light- we should all be broke like Elon Musk.
Beyond having money- people like Elon Musk can always make money- they have the name, the reputation and the good-credit to do so. And they have the right friends.
Try making money with no friends- see how long you keep it.
Ironically too, I have a fellow car-guy friend and personal mentor who mentions to me that I should get back into the car business- but not in the traditional, old model- the "new" model companies like Tesla are hinting...
Dealership-less distribution, a zero-emissions, environmentally friendly "performance" cars- well... You can keep it all. I'll stick with the "old" model- after all- have you ever met a broke dealer principal? I haven't.
My friend even mentioned that I should reach-out to Elon Musk himself... But somehow, I believe- he's got other things on his mind these days.
On another note- did you know what musk is? Before it was synonymous with the said Silicon Valley wiz- it's a secretion that comes from the ass-rectal area of a deer...
Well- Musk is certainly still more than just "a pimple on the asshole of progress..." too bad his ex-wife certainly needs more convincing otherwise.
I was let go from my employer in the last business day of February. It was a long time coming- but perhaps the most prolific moment of it all was when they let my boss go...
My old boss (and I'm leaving his name out of it) was a real company martyr. A real "bank man" as we called them. Did you guess I used to work for a major bank?
While we had a good relationship- I can't say I loved the guy. I did, however, like him a lot.
(Funny thing about love- and in my life this has become more and more relative- you can love someone but not like 0r respect them- very sad, but true. You don't have to love everyone- but liking them and respecting them is a move in the right direction...)
Anyway, my boss was a self-made man- having been one of like ten or twelve from blue-collar, working-class Middlesex County.
He was a military guy- he crossed his T's and dotted his I's... He was Irish- a shoe-in for our line of business- which in actuality is a niche, low-brow part of the game known as Wall Street.
My old line of work loved guys like this- it was just political to do so. He worked hard, he drank, he worked cheap for decades and slowly but surely amassed quite a bit of material success (for a guy like him, anyway)- if only by default- he who stands longest and strongest sticks around long enough to be running the place.
Guys like me, however, while we were liked, and quietly respected- we're never loved. At the time I had left and then came-back to my bank job (largely because of the said boss- and I'll always be grateful for it)- I wasn't looking for love. Just money.
I turned down the title- and got paid more money. It was a skewed place, my old job- and while others pounded their fists with bullshit titles- with what I made in comparison, well... it would have made even King Kong fall-off the Empire State building.
But back to my old boss- I believe personally, and not politically- we respected each other.
When my boss lost his job mainly due to nasty politics and a newly merged company not in-love with his old-school bullshit- some were sad. Others got scared. Me, well... I got excited. Raging hard-on excited.
My boss was our champion- our only reason for being, as we knew it anyway- in a company that was 1.) cheaper than ever and 2.) disinterested in paying for performance but rather cutting the price to build value- another performance metric.
They let him graze in his office for the better part of a year, like a castrated bull, before finally axing him right before Christmas.
He cried. He got into religion. Started looking to the mystical powers in the sky- quietly asking... why?
Why. I knew why. He probably knew I knew why too. Maybe that's why he spoke to me.
There were people who knew this guy for 25 years, working with him and for him for decades. Now that he's gone- well, these people (if they know it or not) are gone too.
They're all relics, products of a by-gone era- never to comeback again.
Some say I should reach-out to him "put a little bird in his ear" and say hello.
I've e-mailed him- just kept it light. Made sure he hasn't blown-himself-up or anything like that... I don't recall ever getting an e-mail back.
So when I did get an e-mail with my boss's name on it- much to my elation- it was a total spam. Directing me to a bogus, Canadian pharmaceutical company selling Viagra on the cheap no less.
I never knew they made so many varieties of penis pills. Then again- they make a variety of hard-ons...
Some you're excited and happy to hear from. Others not.
Ironic, but true. He tried his best. Even if he is ahard-on.
This is outrageous, especially in trying times like these. One thing I've learned, being both employed and unemployed- the corporate ethos in America has gone to total shit.
Most employed at a company 1.) don't know how they got there 2.) if they're successful- they still don't know how they got there and 3.) are obviously are very lazy- only concerned about short-term metrics, with little to do with fundamentals, i.e. a potentially great candidate that hasn't been as lucky as to stay employed.
Not to look at a candidate because they're unemployed? That's like not dating someone because they're not married...
Or not having sex with a person... because well.. . (Okay- I'll stop now.)
Please....
I mean- think about it- they're looking for a job because they want one, they need one. They're out of work.
Do a simple background check and if they're unemployed due to the economy- it's easily found-out. Everything is verifiable- if you're legit (like me).
Most companies who let people go will attest their former employees were let go to reasons such as "right sizing" and other downsizing monikers.
As for recruiters, well. I will say this- Those who can do- do. Those who can't do- teach. And those who can't teach- either consult or recruit.
It may be harsh- but many recruiters are outright lazy. They're used car salesmen who only want to sell a person a job they have on their proverbial lot.
Many are not interested in making a good candidate fit, most are just into the paycheck, the commission in filling a position- right or wrong.
I've worked with a few recruiters and if you don't fit the mold to what they have in their bag- you're not getting a job through them.
Many lack creativity, drive and a sense of potential. Again, if they had all these things- they'd be working a great job- not finding people for jobs.
Not having a job is just one-more-reason to say "no."
But having worked in sales.... (Which is what recruiting really is...) Until you're selling... You're unemployed.
And turning away candidates is a good way to stay- unemployed.
I'm amused at the resurgence of iPhone mania- as Apple launches its all-new and improved iPhone 4. Some 600,000 have already been pre-ordered, despite minor distribution issues.
I'm a fan of the iPhone- I've been using one since July 2, 2007, just a day after the original debuted.
Yes, I'm still using the same, old, original iPhone. ("Loser," right?) Now, when that thing came-out- it was a big deal. And not because I bought one.
The anticipation of the then all-new concept of an iPhone was big news. The first, viable, fully customizable phone that could sync-in to your home computer, well- it was nothing short of revolutionary.
For this Mac user- it was a must have- the capstone to my iMac, my Powerbook, my MacBook, my thousands of dollars of pretty, white and shiny Mac accessories.
I paid over $500 for revolutionary- even had to return it a few times- because, alas, there were issues- but... Almost three years later, I still have a phone.
I also paid $500 to be one of the first in my circle of friends to have one- shit, I was a bona fide celebrity at work- and those idiots took to the iPhone like cavemen took to the discovery of fire.
Now, every idiot has an iPhone- and they should- it's a good phone.
But what amazes me is- the hysteria among the masses seems to get greater and greater as these new iPhones roll-out. It's on the web, it's in the news. It's on social networking sites- like a virus.
There's an old high-school friend of mine on my Facebook (who I haven't spoken to or seen in like 15 years) nice enough guy- became a doctor.
He's married- lives in California, has a child. He's done quite well for himself, I suppose- if that's what you want.
But what I don't get it is- the enthusiasm this seemingly accomplished, busy person is spewing constantly over the net about this stupid phone.
It's just a phone.
Shit- if I were married- had an important career and an equally more important job of being a father- the last thing I would be doing is broadcasting every minute detail (daily, almost hourly) about the roll-out of this stupid phone, on Facebook too, no less.
It's not a stupid phone, its a smart phone, but if I had a life where important things were going on in it- the last thing on my mind would be my stupid phone.
Well, easy for me to say- despite not having much going on too monumental (and I may add- nothing too monumental is going on in car-land- hence the lack of posts lately- I am sorry), I could care less about my phone.
I mean, it's at my side constantly- I do use it a lot for serious business. But it works fine- until it breaks- I'm not buying a new one, for lack of being a "winner" with the latest, and greatest toy.
The other night I fell like a ton-of-bricks, incidentally on a ton-of-bricks- a friend of mine was laying a stone patio and in the dusk of night (and lack of outside lighting- that'll be the next home project I guess) I fell, quite swiftly, over a pile of pavers in his backyard.
I was fine, I am fine. Just a minor scrape on my shin, no bruises, aches, pains or broken-bones, thank God.
I will tell you this- falling at 31 is not like it used to be- but, thankfully, I'm in decent shape enough to be able to still take a downward hit. (And strangely enough- I found it funny too, like I was some kinda toddler, learning to walk or something.... Fall and tell me how it makes you feel.)
My old, original (read aluminum) iPhone took a nice hit too- it's got a neat dent in it- a dent that would have killed a newer, now plastic iPhone.
Funny how I'm proud of this dent. The phone took the business-end, the hard edge of a concrete paver- better the phone than my upper quadricep!
If you take the hits and survive- you're proud of most anything, no matter how small, or serious the dings, and dents may be.
But when you've been there, and done the iPhone before every loser who's now online Twittering about the all-new iPhone 4, well- you'll too think twice about buying a new one.
Seemingly, with this bored society in which we now live- iPhones are still a big deal.
Easy for me to say- I did it first. Then again- I've always been first with the toys.
My advice to you- buy an all-new iPhone 4.
Just don't hurt yourself- you'll never look at your stupid iPhone quite the same way again. **
If you watch television- you've probably seen the commercial by now. A sports/supercar looking thing in white, in a white sound room- sound baffles on the walls... It's strapped to a speed dyno- a microphone is aimed at its unique tri-tipped, center mounted rear exhaust.
A champagne glass is placed in front of a speaker (which is attached to the aforementioned microphone for all your audiophiles out there....)
The car runs through the gears- shrilling, screaming, wanting to rip from its moorings as the microphone records the noise.
The loud engine/exhaust noise breaks the glass.
It's a play on the first (rather successful too I might add) Lexus commercials twenty years ago- when they put stacks of champagne glasses on the hood of the car as it ran on a similar dyno...
Okay- what I just described (maybe in too much detail) is the commercial for the 2011 Lexus LFA- their bid into the world class supercar, exotic sports car arena.
Yes, a Lexus supercar- the kind of cars Porsche, Ferrari, Lamborghini and maybe a dozen others have done, or tried to do for decades.
The LFA has supposedly been in the works since 2000 and finally now, the car is nearing ready for production. It's the latest addition to the Lexus "F" performance brand.
For years it's been a prototype and racing study- and those "in the know" (I'm not one of them- tells you how much I know about cars... HA!) have known about this car for years.
And maybe, just maybe like the Nissan GT-R "Skyline" it has even made its debut on one of those game console franchises?
I don't know, I don't play games...
Well, neither does Lexus, too apparently.
The LFA is their halo car into finally producing a world class sports car? As if they didn't already build a world class vehicle as it was, this is supposed to be their defining moment in a market that is 1) not only competitive in product but 2) almost impossible to penetrate in panache and 3) not exactly profitable, en mass, as a business venture.
Dozens of manufacturers have built ultra-high-performance "supercars" yet only a handful have done it successfully, continuously... Continuously enough to become cultural legends and icons- like Ferrari... And successfully enough to have not gone bankrupt in the process- like most of the others.
The development, the materials, the production and the technologies are expensive to say the least- many manufacturers won't risk the costs to build a low-volume car only a handful will ever consider buying. Look at Honda with the Acura NSX. That was a supercar twenty years ago- they built the thing in low volume for something like a decade, probably lost money on every one of them.
Notice the lack of a true NSX successor? Where is it?
Supercars- it's just bad business. But it's great PR!
I don't have the time, nor the interest to go into every minute detail of the Lexus LFA. But I will delve into little, unique things...
Well, they're not so unique- they're done elsewhere but now, finally Lexus is doing it.
(Like most everything else- everything Lexus has done; has been done by someone else before- sad- but true...)
-202 Miles-Per-Hour
-Zero-to-60 in 3.6 Seconds
-4.6-Liter V10 Engine, 550 Horses
-Carbon Fiber Construction & Underpinnings
-Ceramic Brakes
-500 Will Be Made, Only 20 Per Month
-Custom Configuration, Colors, Swatches, Etc, Etc, Etc... Over 30,000,000,000 Different Possibilities! (Yes, Thirty Billion according to some sources!)
It's going to be "exclusive," it's going to come "anyway you want it..." (within parameters, I'm sure) and it's supposed to redefine Lexus as a world class super car brand- smashing the glasses, for a company that was so inclined to stack-them-up on their idle hoods.
But I fail to see the seriousness of advertising on national television a sports car starting at $375,000.
Starting at $375,000. (There- I said it again.)
That's f'n crazy (with a Lexus capital F), and maybe even a little rude, or assuming if you ask me.
You want to be like Ferrari and Lamborghini? You want the world of ultra-high-end exclusive clientele to take you seriously- don't be caught dead on a 30-second television spot during the evening news.
I mean- Ferrari and Lamborghini never had to advertise- why does Lexus?
But what Lexus is doing, much like Ferrari has done with some of their more expensive, exclusive models- they're leasing these LFAs to the planned 150 North American customers for two years to prevent them from that initial market arbitrage that happens when something like this comes out.
They don't want a secondary market coming up, re-selling these LFAs for multiples more. They're controlling the market for $375,000-plus, plus, plus Lexus vehicles- as if there's really a market for one.
Then again- there's always a market for "Look What I Have..."
The car will supposedly be available for outright purchase in London, in an exclusive Park Lane Lexus agency for those who absolutely, positively have to own it outright.
Knowing what I do about these sorts of things- you want to lease this car- it's not going to be a screaming value on the used car market in a few years anyway... Cars like these, unless they're particular, rare, Italian supercars- don't hold their value well to be considered decent stores of value.
The car's impressive- it is. It looks good, but it does look like a modern Nissan Z or something similar with a VeilSide or Junction Produce kit on it.
Maybe I'm just painting with too broad a stroke here...
Maybe so- but the Lexus LFA is nothing so special, or unique in a segment where the sky, and the budget, knows no-limits.
If Lexus wants to impress me- they would have built the LFA for $150,000- because really, that's what the Lexus brand of a F-errari is really worth to my poor, TV commercial watching ass. The LFA may be Lexus' latest attempt to their Pursuit of Perfection but it will always be the pursuit of something they'll never really be in a world that has been, since others have done it better... And more expensive even still.
Don't ask me what I know.
I think it looks like a big, fancy Celica if you ask me.
Right around the time Obama got in the White House- I think it was HBO that did a documentary on this White House correspondent that has been covering Presidential and political affairs since Eisenhower.
I thought- wow- how cool is that? Helen Thomas- going on the better part of 60 years covering American, world and Presidential events- really put it in her mouth this time...
This isn't a political blog, nor is it a world affairs blog. I got nothing on Politico, the Huffington Post and other fine publications.
Neither am I going to comment on my position with Israel.
They say the two things you shouldn't discuss among friends are politics and religion- and I'll leave it at that.
Seems like Chrysler has taken a page out of the success saga that has been Toyota- but it took a page from one of the later volumes. Wha, whaaaaaa.
(Okay, bad joke.)
But I'll tell you what isn't a joke (well, it actually was a joke...) I sold Chryslers about six years ago now- and about the only thing that differentiated us at all (in a positive way) were two cars- the 300 and the Town & Country minivan.
Forget the 300- it was a fad.
Without those two vehicles then, in 2004/2005- Chrysler didn't have a product. Now, one of them- the Town & Country could develop a short in the automatic sliding doors- that could catch fire.
Just what you want to hear when you're thinking about a safe family van.
Jeeps Wranglers which brakes may fail- and Dodge Calibers whose accelerators are going the way of Toyota's.
But now Chrysler is run by Fiat- and I like the fact that they're instilling that Fiat quality they were renowned for back when America drove Fiats.
Okay, that was also a joke too. But the joke isn't funny anymore. Time for some Morrissey.
I hate the BMW M3- I see one on the road and automatically- the guy driving it is either a spoiled hipster or an immature d-bag with more money than sense.
You gotta watch these guys- more-often-than-not they can't drive and if they can- they know they're in the Ultimate Driving Machine- ultimate enough to pull something stupid and cause an accident for everyone else.
Well, hate's a strong word- I mean, it's not the M3's fault. And I'm just now putting it in perspective enough where- where it's okay to drive an M3. (More on that below...)
It's not the car's fault I grew-up in an neighborhood and time when from the day you made your Bar/Bat Mitzvah- you saved your $50 savings bonds and $36 gift checks (double Chai- it's good luck...) just so you could buy half, a quarter or (most times) none... of a BMW M3 in four years' time.
(Hell- if you had a thousand $36 checks- you had a brandy-new BMW M3- a stripped-out one, in 1995 money anyway...)
You didn't know what it could do- you didn't care- it was the best small BMW money could buy- all the magazines said so- and it was expensive. And fast. And... and... "Daddy said I can have one..."
Ever notice how Car and Driver Magazine always talked-up the BMW M3 "back in the day," it won, and a BMW won like every side-by-side comparison they published?
(Did I mention I hate Car and Driver Magazine too? But that's another story- for another time.)
My first experiences with the M3 came around 1988- the Filipino guys- a bunch of brothers or cousins who lived in a house down the street in the cul-de-sac had one- a Henna Red one- the first generation E30 version- when it was a true four-cylinder racing homlogation. They also had a Medium Blue Mercedes 300E with an AMG kit (back when you had to order your AMG kit from Beverly Hills Motoring Accessories...) But the M3 was their favorite- it was the car they drove sideways when they weren't washing it in the cul-de-sac.
They didn't cut their lawn or paint their house, but the M3 was always clean and in good order... Priorities, you know...
But that was over 20 years ago- and the first BMW M3s were once (basically) race cars, converted for street use- produced and sold only because German DTM Sedan Racing rules mandated it- so BMW could homologate, certify the car for competition.
Over the years the car got bigger, heavier- straight sixes then and now a full-blown V8s under the hood. Sure, they still race them- but its more like believing the Chevrolet Monte Carlo or Dodge Charger you buy is the same car NASCAR races on Sunday... It's just not the same these days...
The M3s are good cars- they rate well and go even better- I just don't respect the M3 or the crowd it appeals to- little kids who want to go fast.
Just the other day I saw a guy in his late 60's driving a fairly current M3- I got sick to my stomach. Maybe he was driving his grandchild's car while his 7-Series was in the shop?
I just can't see why a grown-ass-man would want to be caught dead in an M3.
It's small, the ride is harsh, it's noisy and brash. And it's really expensive- like twice what they were when I was a teenager.
Okay, so when is it okay to drive an M3? When it's 2010, you're 31 and you drive a 1995 E36 M3. This is when it's acceptable to be caught dead driving an M3. When you're in your thirties and the M3 is almost half-way to being in its thirties too.
I've decided that it's okay to like (or lust) the M3 when it's the M3 you would have gotten if you had a thousand $36 double-Chai notes to blow on a new BMW when you were seventeen.
Then and only then are you not a total asshole. Instead you're nostalgic!
When it's either Dakar Yellow or Daytona Violet Metallic, a 3-liter straight-six model, you're okay by me. (Maybe an Alpine White Lightweight version with Motorsports trim if you want to really impress me and make me jealous...)
Sure, I know they uprated the torque on the '96 models and punched-it-out to a 3.2-liter- but I'll take a basic '95 coupe- that was the one... 240 horses- just one throttle body (the European versions of the same car had six throttle bodies and something like 80 or a 100 more horses... The USA cars were pigs in comparison.)
I can close my eyes and see the Car and Driver issue with the yellow M3 blazing across the cover- $36,000... 0-60 in 5.6 seconds. 240 horses.
I even remember they took two dimes and drove over them with the car- the steering and suspension were supposed to be so precise- you could feel a dime under the tires- giving an idea of what positive, precision road-feel is all about.
Eh, looking back- who cares? What did I know then (or now) anyway?
But I'd pick-one-up today (if you can find clean, original one...) to re-live the innocence, finally!
I'm glad I didn't have one back then. I wouldn't have appreciated it as much as I do now; for lack of being a total jaded asshole, too, of course. I did, however, come very close to an M3 in my somewhat youth- I had a 1986 Mercedes-Benz 190E 2.3-16 Valve in my mid-twenties... A Cosworth Mercedes.
(For that story- I'm going to entitle it... "Memories... of a Maniac.")
Another story. For yet, again another time.
The M3 for me will always be for me- the other car. For another, way simpler, and thankfully unspoiled time.
